shelley_winters (
shelley_winters) wrote2005-11-21 06:06 pm
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Shelley had been tired when they got back, so tired she had gone to bed immediately rather than reading as she normally did.
But sleep, when it came, was disturbed and confusing. It is warm in her room, but she shivers in her sleep, dancing alone in a room that is empty but she's being watched...
The girl sits up slowly, rubbing her eyes. The tension isn't going away even in the peace of the night, that prickling of undefinable vulnerable terror that the dreams she has been having leave her with.
After splashing her face with water, she quietly steps out of her room to wander down the corridor outside. It's dark and silent, which is oddly comforting as she walks up and down through the silent house, avoiding the area where Elan's study is. He sleeps little, and is often awake working at this time of night.
Her bare feet make no sound on the smooth floor, only the faint brush of her nightdress as she walks telling of her presence. She stops only to look out of the window for a time, trying to calm herself to sleep again. A soft mist has replaced the former clear sky, and she can only just make out the garden past it.
But sleep, when it came, was disturbed and confusing. It is warm in her room, but she shivers in her sleep, dancing alone in a room that is empty but she's being watched...
The girl sits up slowly, rubbing her eyes. The tension isn't going away even in the peace of the night, that prickling of undefinable vulnerable terror that the dreams she has been having leave her with.
After splashing her face with water, she quietly steps out of her room to wander down the corridor outside. It's dark and silent, which is oddly comforting as she walks up and down through the silent house, avoiding the area where Elan's study is. He sleeps little, and is often awake working at this time of night.
Her bare feet make no sound on the smooth floor, only the faint brush of her nightdress as she walks telling of her presence. She stops only to look out of the window for a time, trying to calm herself to sleep again. A soft mist has replaced the former clear sky, and she can only just make out the garden past it.
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"Then you are safe from any harm by me."
A pause and then the repetition. A glint of white teeth as he speaks slowly and precisely.
"Safe."
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Shelley doesn't move.
One day of peace in however many, what is that? How much more will it hurt, the danger, the betrayal, if she trusts him even for such a short time?
She sits in silence, fear and doubt still twisting, but she can't let it go.
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A delicate, chaste kiss at the corner of her mouth. So very gentle. Loving.
But none I think do there embrace.
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"I asked you to stop."
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"Do you enjoy being miserable?"
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Her small voice is determined, bright eyes turned away still.
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"Are you alive though?"
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"...So far."
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"Your heart is beating, but are you alive? Your heart is beating your slow march to the grave, but you can die without living."
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The urge to try and pull his hand from her is strong, but the girl stubbornly concetrates on looking away from him. She can't stop herself shaking.
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A single fingertip trailed up her shoulders and neck where it joined the rest of his hand in touching her face. His mellifluous voice sang so very softly to her. The winter's rain pattered outside the window, a time signature to his music.
In this white night fantasy
"Crestfallen soul, rest for this night.
Love is here, right here under my wings."
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A note of panic under her voice, misery apparent as she shifts involuntarily under the gentle trailing of his fingertips.
tame me
"Stop. Please..."
you can never change me
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"Do you want to be miserable any longer? Do you want keep being in pain from the loneliness?"
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A low voice. Shelley is still stubborn, even now. But it's easier to breathe suddenly, in spite of the chill in the air.
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"...Are you really?"
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They both know that she's lying. Shelley almost manages to glare at him. Almost.
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"Let me hold you."
His thumb slid across her cheek.
"We have a peace till morning's light. No fear, no pain."
The soft rain came down, the low, rolling thunder.
"Let me hold you, and you can have rest from the misery for this one night."
His body slid next to hers. Bare chest against her as his white robe clung to his body.
"Tomorrow will come as days do, but we will leave it for tomorrow. Let us have peace for this night."
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"It's not... that simple."
All very well for him to tell her no fear when she remembers what she does. Peace. But there can never be trust.
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"No, it is not..."
A pause and then a glance at her face.
"But as you know, a complex sequence with many pieces is often reduced to a few pieces for those few turns."
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To Shelley at least, Sha'rah makes sense. This is beyond her.
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"True..."
A gentle hand laid on her shoulder.
"Would it not be worth it to have an end to the loneliness for but one night? One night's peace."
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Shelley doesn't react to the hand.
"...I don't- know. No. I-"
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"Let me hold you."
A warm embrace on the cool night. The soft sound of the rain, of their hearts beating.
"Let us have peace for one evening. You can rest in peace. No loneliness, no misery."
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They agreed. She agreed, didn't she? Shelley sits very still. No response to his kiss.
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"Of course... Why not use the opportunity for respite from your loneliness and misery?"
Again, the quietly insistent statement.
"Let me hold you."
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